Tricked me with Eisenhower

“Eisenhower is dead.”

It’s what I tell myself if I ever start to experience anything like irrational exuberance. It always brings be back down to earth.

Now though, I’m being told that the man who wrestled Adolph Hitler atop the Reichstag and threw his broken corpse down onto the street below with the heart ripped out and then flew to the moon on a stream of golden fire has been reincarnated a bit in Chuck Hagel.

My heart is lifting.

They even included Eisenhower quotations, wisdom which once dripped from the lips of the American President who never should have left us, the American President who traveled to the sun and brought us back nuclear energy, the man who single handedly found the cures to over four million diseases that hadn’t even started yet and so prevented trillions of deaths. Mantras for us to repeat in our heads all day long…

But Eisenhower is dead.

Chuck Hagel is not even a one trillionth of what Eisenhower was. And I say that even though I kinda like Chuck, (if he isn’t allowed to talk about anything except for the military and American foreign policy: if he strays outside those lines I start to feel uncomfortable and say things like “geez, chuck…” and start looking around uncomfortably and shifting in my seat. It’s even worse if he’s around people he doesn’t know and is clearly tied to me, or I’ve said nice things about him in the past to these people. Then it’s like suggesting a movie to people and forgetting that Julia Roberts is in it and there’s this whole love story going on. “I don’t support this” your eyes say to your friends, desperately.)

Chuck is merely relatively sensible on foreign policy. Outside of this current shitheap of a political milieu he’d be an outsider to the corridors of reasonableness. Eisenhower, on the other hand, could sit down with Bismarck or Wellington, look them in the eye, and discuss politics. (They would force Hagel to wear a leash and make him dance their contemporary dance crazes.)

I caught something last night and have a bad fever, so this post ends now.*

*-This is why I love blogs. Imagine Crusade in Europe had ended with “I am so fucking sick. Fuck this book. I don’t even remember what happened after that. We administered occuppied Germany or something. Sure it was fine. I think I just heard a monkey fighting a pig outside. That’s fucked. Gotta go.”

 

WWI Toes become Iraq War Korans

So much better than WWI. Back then you had to blow a toe off (I was told by my first grade teacher who really didn’t seem to like the war). Now you just shoot a Koran.
People get offended, you get some disciplinary unfun, but you also get to go home and keep your toes.
This is exactly like when I figured out that if you punch someone during basketball in gym class, you no longer have to play fucking basketball. (I wish I’d realized the same went for Volleyball and English.)

 

Amazonian ownership

Pretty sure that the Amazon is part of the Black Forest.

 

John Yoo from 2006

Check out the Mason Federalist podcast starring Dr. John Yoo from 2006.  It’s a good look into the way the now infamous Yoo thinks about the law.

I’m having some trouble linking, so here’s the process: subscribe to the podcast in whatever podcast aggregator you have.  Then download the Yoo episode (there are only two episodes available on the stream).

 

More Chavez

So.

Angela Merkel noted that different Latin American countries have different views, and aren’t all spoken for by say, one of the least popular countries in the region.

How would you respond if you were Chavez:

a) Nothing. Different countries are different countries. Would Merkel complain if someone had mentioned that she doesn’t set policy for all of Europe?
b) Call her a political descendant of Hitler.
c) Destroy your country’s economy and civil rights.

The answer is b). I tried to trip you up with c), but obviously he hadn’t done that in response to anything Merkel had done, but just because he either cares nothing for Venezuelans and longs only to buy power and destroy the country in that quest or is delusional.

Also, as a congrats to me: I just pulled off 2 hours straight of sleep!

 

Occupied by Occupations

I’ve got occupations on my mind.

I’m thinking of:
The Tripartite partition of Poland
The Polish occupation of Prussia/Pomerania
The Israeli occupation of Palestine
The International occupation of Afghanistan
The International occupation of lesser Germany after WW2

These are modern occupations I know relatively more about. There’s plenty more obviously that I don’t think I know enough about to get much information from.

Two I think were useful police actions, two are unbelievably nasty, and one I’m back and forth on. I figure you can guess which is which.

Since I’m thinking about them I’ll probably be writing about them over the next little while. I regret having killed my old blogs because I had some commenters there to at least discuss things with a bit. Even if we all mostly just talked about things like my “suck your pickle for a nickle” 19th Century hooker pickup line…

Also, while we’re on the topic of my old blogs, if you read them you know there’s very little chance I’ll ever mention this on-blog again and will instead talk about game theory for a post and then celebrity gossip, then how I got my foot stuck in something, and how blah blah blah…. But what will happen is just that the articles I tend to link to over the next while will more likely be about these topics.

Blah.

 

BCM WTC Commission Report on The WTC Attack

A Blog Called Malice’s World Trade Commission’s Report on the WTC Attack has found, much to the surprise of scientists, engineers, and architects, that the WTC buildings were built entirely from wood and wood byproducts.

WTC pre-erection.